Thursday, February 23, 2012

Far From Home

"Do you Ever Wonder who you are? Do you ever wonder as you stare into the stars, where you began and how you got this far from home? Have you ever walked along the shore? Have you ever seen the water dancing back and forth? Did you look inside to see if there was more to life? There's a dream taking wing, there's a voice that wants to sing, and even in the deepest darkest night, the torches raise to the sky, there are hands that hold it high, you were born to keep it burning bright. You were made to fly, you were meant to shine, Child of mine! You will never ever stand alone, you were never called to bear the burdens on your own. Where there is fear love will take control and lead you on!" Have you ever felt this way? These are words from a song I was listening to today. I will admit that I have felt this way and was feeling this way today and the past week or so. Sometimes I really wonder what I'm suppose to learn from events in my life. Sometimes I wonder what Heavenly Father really wants me to accomplish. Sometimes I feel alone and sometimes I have fears and try to carry the burdens on my own. I have been having situations in which I don't know the solution to. As I've turned to loved ones and friends to find solutions the same response keeps coming and that is LOVE. How can I show the same Love to people in my life as the savior would show? This has been a huge concern and on my mind as of late. It's so hard to do this sometimes. I went into teaching because I had a dream of helping and molding young minds. I have found its not that easy. I was feeling the overwhelming feeling today of how can I do better? I was suppose to go to a Training for school today and so I was going to miss a Relief Society meeting we were to have tonight. So, I drove to where I thought the address for the training was, and I went to the wrong location. I was not going to make it in time to the other location. Luckily, I could just cancel it online and would not be penalized. This allowed me the opportunity to go to the Relief society program. By this point I was tired and overwhelmed. I was convincing myself not to go. However, I had a good friend telling me to go and my heart kept telling me to go as well. I showed up with a hardened heart (more so just an emotional wreck). As the program begin I was an emotional mess. It was about doing family history and attending God's House. It opened with a musical number that literally made me cry like a baby. It told the story of a forgotten soul who was waiting and waiting on the other side for someone to find her. It was a song of loneliness, a song of yearning for help that could not be done on her own. It required the help of us, the help of someone beyond herself. It was a duet and there was a response by someone in the audience who said I will help you and together we will reach God. It was really powerful. Then many dressed in white came to the pulpit and told their stories. They told their names and asked if anyone in the audience had their name.(they gave us all little slips with names on them when we entered). Some people who shared their story had someone in the audience who had their name and some did not. They were lost, they were forgotten. It was a powerful image. Then a father and daughter sang "Your not alone" All the family except the daughter were found and their work was done. The words go something like "Your not alone, even though right now your on your own, you are loved in ways that can't be shown, your needs are known, your not alone. And when you cry your just letting go of heartache deep inside so tomorrow there will be sunshine in the sky and love close by, your not alone. I know that its not easy, but I know that it won't last because one who loves you more than me is sending blessings fast." I know this is true. I feel so blessed to have this knowledge. There are a lot of bumps in the roads of life. However, the joys overwhelm the bumps. I'm so glad to have a testimony of Jesus Christ and his love for me. I'm so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who allows me to be blessed and shows his love for me in ways that are special and important to me.  I have tried so many times in my life to do things on my own and follow my own ways, but I have learned time and time again things go a lot better when I follow his plan and his ideas! I'm grateful for the tender mercies I experience and tonight was one of those! Its always nice to be reminded of the wonderful spirit and gospel that is in my life. It truly brings me TRUE JOY! For that, I am most grateful. We are never to far from home and we should do our part to make sure that all those whom we love Return Home with us! Have a blessed night!

1 comment:

Jason and Dana said...

Abby, I've been totally MIA with blogs lately. But I wish I could give you a hug right now. I miss you! You know that? I wish we lived in the same city. I have a friend that just moved to Vegas. That really has nothing to do with anything, but I just thought of it as I was typing.
I know life doesn't always work the way we'd like it to, but you have had some amaing experiences others will never get to have. I'm sure you've learned priceless lessons meant specifically for you. It's such a comfort to remember there is a plan. Love you Abby. You are amazing!