A Loaded Post..READ ON if youd like!

First things first! I was thinking of someone really amazing yesterday! My Uncle David. He is such a good man. He passed away 4 years ago yesterday. He left an amazing legacy and he has a beautiful family here whom has treated me so well and whom I absolutley adore. I had the great experience of spending a lot of time with my wonderful uncle the summer before he passed away. He taught me a lot of great things by his example and I had a lot of many wonderful spiritual experiences that will live with me throughout my life. Thank you Carraway family for your example of faith, charity, and love. I will forever love my uncle David and I will forever hold him as a man of honor in my life! I love him like my own father!

My Aunt and her 4 Beautiful Children

My Uncle Dave's Grave..He's not there hes in a much better place!

Ok so I sit in a car for four hours everyday....So basically I have a lot of time to sit and think  about whats going on around me and about life! Its good but I think my brain is on overload sometimes!! So here is my most recent thoughts and experiences.

On wednesday we went to the grocery store. So, in the states this may be an hour endeavor at the most. Well, here its a completley different story. We left around 4 and got home around 7. This is not really the problem. The problem is the drive up there and the things we have to see and experience. So, on the way the first thing I saw was a little girl probably like 7 and a dog. The little girl looked terrified of the dog. So, she grabbed a rock, and cautiously walked past the dog ready to throw the rock if need be. So, the poor little girl Im sure had been attacked before. Then, we saw a strange thing. We saw a boy roll a tire across the street and put it in the back of a police truck. Apparently they are efficient here why waste time going to the tire store, why when your in traffic you can just whistle a young boy down and he will throw it in yoru truck for ya. The saddest part was the officer gave him money but by the look at the young mans face it wasn't enough. But, what could he do it was a police officer that gave it to him. It was painful looking at him and his look of disappointment. Then, as we were saying this is to much to handle a little boy came begging at our window. He kept using his hands to show us I need money for food (using his hands this is the message he sent). So, after we said no it didn't work. He stayed by our window for literally like 5 minutes just over and over asking for money. it was soo sad! I would give money, but I've done that before and its unsafe. After I did several other young boys surrounded our car asking for money. So, it was heartbreaking. We were like geez who knew going to the grocery store could be so painful! On the way home we somehow got talking about childbirth which got me thingking about childbirth here. Wow, not only is it all natural but its probably very very unsanitary! I then asked A the question....do you think peopel here are happy? I mean they don't know any different than their lifes, but still its gotta be hard. She said I don't know how anyone could have happiness in this life and environment. I don't know its an interesting concept.

This brings me to Thursday. I went to The English class again. It was great! I love associating with the people of Haiti and of the church. There were 4 people there and I loved talking with them and getting to know them! It really is a bright spot in my week. We had to take 2 of them home because it was literally DOWNPOURING!! So, as we were traveling in the car I took the opportunity to ask one them my question from the night before. I asked him....are you happy? I asked this not just randomly but he was just talking about how hard life was. So, I just said even though life is hard you are happy right?? I mean you have a family and the gospel.  He said something along these lines. He basically said yes but no. He said it is hard realizing that you can't achieve your dreams and you can't procide for your family. This got me thinking about how lucky we are again. Except this is in a way i never really thought about. Do you know how lucky we are to DREAM?? Who would've thought this was such a blessing. I realized when he said that, that its true in Haiti many can not probably achieve their dreams of being a certain career or having nice things, its just not really possible here. Some peoples dreams of providing for their family is really not even attainable, seeing how 80 to 90 % of the population is in poverty and can not find work.  So, think about that....we are so lucky to be able to dream and have goals that are attainable!

Then there was today. As I was driving in the car I was noticing all the trash in street. See it rained last night and and that meant trash was everywhere. I noticed one extremley large pile of trash however. As I looked at it I then looked and saw a few men just sitting there doing nothing. I see a lot of that! It got me thinking. Why don't all these people who aren't working or doing anything come together and help their country by cleaning it up. They could make it a more enjoyable place to be, but they don't! They just sit in the mess. I can't judge them. I don't know their life! However, it makes me wonder..would you just accept it because thats the way life is? Or would you get up and do something about it? Its hard to know what we would do since we weren't raised in this environment. I would like to think I would. Ok and my last thought for today was this. Am i becoming numb to things?? AFter living here for 6 weeks I have just come to accept everything thing I see as normalicy! As we were driving home we witnessed a car accident. In the states I would of stopped and made sure everyone was ok. I wouldve been a witness for the police on whos fault it was. But here I just wanted to get out as soon as possible. I also saw not one was hurt so I found myself saying of course there was an accident I'm suprised I haven't seen more. It suprised me how I reacted to it. I hope im not becoming to numb.

 Anway, that is it for now! Im going out to do some more service tomorrow! I love it! Such a bright spot in my week!!